Vote me off the island, I’ve had enough of this,
The chaos and confusion are things that I won’t miss.
The whole damn show is scripted, the bullshit never ends,
Oh, how I miss the time when we could all be friends.
The drama isn’t real, so what the hell’s the deal?
He lied about the “steal”, that was his big reveal.
Canada is not a state, that Gulf is “Mexico”,
I have half a mind to tell him where to go.
We don’t need no arch, our Center’s named for John,
Who cares about the tariffs when our Civil Rights are gone?
They fired all the experts and put in syncopates,
A page from the playbook of sleazy autocrats.
Show them all your papers, or they’ll lock you up,
He staged a phony contest and won the Silver Cup.
If you dare to cross him, you’ll get put on a list,
And if he disappears you, he’ll say you are not missed.
He’ll sue you or indict you, cuz he never gave a shit,
About the Constitution that was so wisely writ.
Vote me off the island, it ain’t working out so well,
He can wear orange makeup on his way to Hell!
LDT Groundhog’s Day, ‘26
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Outlaws, Outrages and Outright Lies 